Saturday, February 09, 2008

Manly Beer Review - Coors "the Banquet Beer"

I know I don't need to tell you, but this review has been a long time coming. Actually, it's been longer coming than you might think. I first bought a six-pack of Coors back in October, intending to review it here.

As you can tell, that didn't work out exactly as planned.

So, a few days ago I picked up 12 cans of Coors "Banquet Beer," otherwise known to most of us as "the Coors that isn't light."

Coors, like all of the beers I've reviewed here, has a long history. Coors "Banquet" Beer was first brewed back in 1874. Along the way, Coors started brewing a lot of other beers, including Killian's Irish Red, Keystone, and shamefully, Zima.

To get it out of the way, I do not like this beer. It's bitter, it's got a nasty aftertaste, and if that's what comes out of the waters of Colorado, well, I'm not moving there. If you put it in a glass (not recommended. Instead, drink a different beer.), you'll see it's a deep golden color, with a good, thick head. Appearances, as they say, can deceive.

Furthermore, it seems to me that Coors has spent too much time working on gimmicky packaging to sell their beer and not enough on, y'know, making good beer. My cans have a "Frost Brew Liner," which, presumably, keeps it tasting..... frosty cold? Their bottles currently have a label which lets a fellow know if his beer is cold enough to choke down. For shame. In the past, they've had wide-mouth bottles and a can with a wide mouth and a venting hole. Presumably, the idea is to get the beer down your throat before you notice it tastes like crap.

For a beer that costs more than Pabst Blue Ribbon, you'd think they could make it taste good.

Anyway, I hate to be harsh on a beer that generations of manly American men have been drinking, so I'm just going to say that perhaps you should pick up another beer. Maybe one of these other ones that I've reviewed would be to your taste:

Pabst Blue Ribbon
Michelob Lager
Miller High Life
Schlitz

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, you think miller high life and Schlitz are better than Coors banquet??? I've been drinking Coors for a while and I've never had to "choke" it down. Nor do I think It has a "nasty" aftertaste. the taste may be slightly bitter but, personally, I think that makes Coors Coors and I don't believe that ruins the taste whatsoever. I live in Texas and if you where to come down here you'd find that 7/10 supermarkets/ gas stations are out of Coors banquet. Seriously. Its a bitch. But what you'll always find is every other brand of beer in large stock. people wouldn't be buying it if it had a nasty aftertaste like you so eloquently put it. And from the small list of beer that you recommend people try instead I can already tell your an idiot.

Unknown said...

Actually if all your redneck 7/10 supermarkets and gas stations are sold out of Coors Banquet all it means is hat you dumb redneck Texans d enjoy shitty beer. People buy a lot of McDonalds but in no way is it the best burger out there...the only idiot is you and your fellow Texans. Don't know good beer fro shit like Coors