Friday, April 28, 2006
A good sign
The interview went poorly, although the guy I talked to suggested another position I might be a good fit for. We'll see what happens.
I can just imagine it now, lunch times spent congregating with other sketchy-motorcycle-types, the occasional races up and down the street in front of the office, and of course, figuring out how to write the name of the company while doing burnouts in the parking lot.
Fingers crossed...
Thursday, April 27, 2006
100 things 16 - 20
16. Although I do not miss snow, I do wish Phoenix would get more rain.
17. I have so many ideas I sometimes get stressed out about having time to pursue them all.
18. As a kid I was taught the importance of shaking hands correctly. In fact, my grandfather felt it was a serious enough issue that he would shake hands with me everytime he saw me and emphasize the importance of a firm handshake and eye-contact. At the time, I thought he was a bit off his rocker, but I now see the wisdom in it. My first impressions of people are rarely wrong, and a crummy handshake is always a red flag.
In fact, when meeting a previous newly-hired boss, I knew I was in for a rough time when he didn't make eye-contact and gave me the limpest handshake I've ever encountered. I was so right. Later, I wondered how the hell he got the job in the first place with a squishy fish handshake like that.
19. I chew ice.
20. I've noticed that when you're laying under a car or bike, it's easy to forget the following rule: Righty-tighty, Lefty-loosey. More than once I've strained away at a drain plug for a couple minutes before I remember that I'm turning the wrench the wrong way.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Having the right tool to screw up the job
I have been trying to get the battery out of the car, on and off, for a couple weeks. The problem was that one of the bolts attaching a cable to the battery is a stupid, odd size. Who the hell keeps a 7mm wrench on hand to get a battery out of their AMERICAN car? Even my good Craftsman ratchet set didn't have a 7mm socket.
Anyway, I finally broke down today and bought a 7mm wrench. It took me more time to get the wrench out of it's stupid anti-theft packaging than it did to open the hood of the buick and round that bolt right off.
So now I'm stuck again. I guess I'll see if one of the neighbors has a pair of vice-grips so I can get that bolt outta there.
Any of you want a '91 Buick Century Parts car? It's going cheap!
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Just Dumb.
I arrived about 10 minutes early, and hung around for about 45 minutes, and that's when I noticed that I was at the wrong place. The Paradise Bakery was across the street.
Where was I standing? At a Wildflower Cafe.
For fuck's sake. David Bowie is very disappointed with me.
Friday, April 21, 2006
100 things 11-15
11. I am a huge fan of Weird Al Yankovic.
12. The best episode of Good Eats was the one where Alton Brown delivered cookies to Girl Scouts on his SV650.
13. I saw Ronnie James Dio in concert last year. I am not ashamed of that.
14. I am terrible about regular vehicular maintenance. I hardly ever remember to check tire pressures, oil levels, coolant levels, do oil changes... Excuse me, I need to run out to the garage for a second.
15. As a kid I was terrified of rollercoasters. I flat out refused to go on them. So it is weird that I was so eager to jump off a high-dive platform. You know how people talk about time slowing down so you can fully appreciate the stupid thing you just did? Yeah. Here's the chain of events when I did that: Jump. Hold breath. Expect to hit water. No water yet. Nope. Wonder where the water is. Still falling. Think: "WHERE'S THE FREAKING WATER??" About 15 minutes later I finally landed in the water. After that, rollercoasters didn't scare me anymore.
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Things which should not be.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Monster vs. VX800
It doesn't really matter, because "easy to work on" isn't the first thing comes up when someone mentions a Ducati. Someday, when I've got cash coming out of my ears, I'll probably finally get a Duck of my very own, but until then I'll make do with something else.
All the same, that Monster felt like home. I was daydreaming the other day about the bike (daydreaming doesn't cost much, at least), and it finally hit me that the reason I liked the bike so much was because it was almost identical to my VX. Check it out!
VX800

Ducati

Same sexy lines, both come in black, both have v-twins, they're hard to get parts for... Shoot, they're practically the same bike!
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
100 things 6 - 10
6. The only birthday cake from my childhood I can remember (without the aid of photos) is the one that had a metallic green plastic chopper as a decoration. Naturally, I kept it and played with it until it finally broke.
7. One of the things I love about the band Clutch is their appreciation of the importance of Evel Knievel (A gentleman as well as a scholar).
8. I wore combat boots when I was in high school (as was only right). I polished them regularly and would always get annoyed at how scuffed up they'd be by noon the next day. I don't worry about that as much anymore.
9. You know how excited Pee Wee Herman got about his bicycle at the start of "Pee Wee's Big Adventure"? I can relate.
10. Like every other guy in America, I watched American Choppers when it first came on the air. I only watched 2 episodes before I gave up (too little time on motorcycles, too much time watching blowhards argue), but I couldn't believe how many people I heard talking about the show. Then I learned that "The OC" was in no way related.
Monday, April 17, 2006
Weekend Well Spent
Note the lack of clutter, newly added moto-appreciation comfy chair and dramatically parked VX800.Well, if you'll excuse me, there's a comfy chair waiting for me in my garage.
Sunday, April 16, 2006
Friday, April 14, 2006
Stopping to help
Naturally, I pulled in as quickly as I could to see if he needed help. I do, after all, carry a leatherman, a large adjustable wrench, and little concern about stripping bolts on other people's bikes.
Just kidding about that last bit.
By the time I got to the side of the road, he had gotten the bike running again and pulled up next to me with a "what the hell is this thing doing?" kind of look on his face. Apparently, it would start fine, and he could sit there are rev the motor up to his heart's delight, but he'd put it in gear and the thing would die within 10 feet. I watched it happen twice.
He told me that he was test riding the bike, and that he'd decided not to buy it. I told him that seemed like a pretty good decision.
So, why the heck would it just up and die like that? My first thought is "operator error," but I didn't witness anything out of the ordinary (that doesn't mean he didn't have it in 4th gear, though). Any of you mechanics out there want to hazard a guess?
Anyway, I offered to follow him, but he told me not to worry about it. I hope he and the bike made it back ok.
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Riding to Interviews
The people you meet are going to know right away that you are the kind of person that takes risks, stays cool under pressure, and occasionally smells like gasoline. These are all good traits to have in the business world.
Personally, when I get off of my bike, I'm a superhero. I can bust down doors, fix evil-doers with a steely glare, and bend steel bars into interesting shapes. When I'm charged up like that, a little interview is a piece of cake. Sell myself? Hell, I'll talk you into buying three of me, and you'll ask me if you can buy the extended service plan.
People love a biker. They've always got fun questions like "do you own a car?" and "how do you stand the heat in the summer?" Of course, if they don't like bikers, you probably won't get the job. Initially that seems bad, but when you think about it, do you want to work for someone that doesn't at least have a passing appreciation for motorcycles? I know I don't.
The moral for today, boys and girls, is that you shouldn't play it totally safe on your way to an interview. You want to have that little edge that makes them know that you're a dynamic, energetic, slightly crazed person who sticks with his/her passions. You want them to ask themselves why they waited so long to hire a rider.
Also, everyone loves seeing a rider wearing a 3 piece suit.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
100 Things
So I noticed Chris Cope has an ongoing list of 100 things. It appears to me that the 100 things are exclusively odd facts about him.
I think that's kind of a cool idea (and a good way to cheat when you're low on ideas for a post), so I'm going to rip him off and start my own list of 100 things.
1. When I was a kid, I was irresistably drawn to immobile objects regardless of my choice of locomotion. A few of the more notable objects I crashed into are: A fire hydrant, a tree (not that remarkable, except I was on a skateboard. How the hell did I do that?), a bike rack outside of school, a sandbar in a lake (in a boat, naturally), and a storage shed. And more than once I've been just standing/sitting there and suddenly found myself on the ground.
2. I have been recruited to be in a Viking-metal band. More than once.
3. When I was a kid, I wanted to grow up to be a garbage man. Of course, back then, garbage men worked as a team, and one guy rode on the back of the truck (guess which guy I wanted to be). They don't do that anymore (that I've seen, anyway), so I'm no longer interested in the arcane art of garbage collection.
4. I secretly miss the motorcycle magazines I read when I lived in Sweden.
5. I sometimes get tired of explaining that blacksmiths do not shoe horses. Farriers do. And, quite frankly, horses scare me.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Sweet, sweet saddle time
And now that I've said that, I have no doubt that hilarity will shortly ensue. Hopefully whatever falls off next will be cheap/easy to replace.
Here's a quick list of things that need to get done on the mighty VX800:
1. oil change
2. new plugs and valve adjustment
3. new air filters (This is just going to have to wait a while longer, because those suckers are EXPENSIVE).
4. general wipe down to get all the bird crap and bug guts off.
As I mentioned, I've been getting crazy amounts of saddle time in lately. I've already put 50 miles on today, and it's barely past lunch time.
Monday, April 10, 2006
So begins week 2
Which means if I want to get a full-time company going before someone else hires me, I need to get cracking. And, for your information, I HAVE been working on some product development. So I've got that going...
So far, the most awesome part of being unemployed is all the riding I get to do. I'm riding EVERYWHERE. Interviews, meetings, post office, lunch, more meetings, more lunch, buying things to fix up the house... I put 1oo miles on the bike on Friday without even trying. Of course, that's easy to do in Phoenix.
Saturday, April 08, 2006
Sometimes, people don't suck
So I was in a tight spot.
I heard some kid behind me say something, and a dad say "Yeah, he's got a motorcycle." Naturally, I turned on the charm and asked if they had any duct tape. They didn't. I asked another guy, and he seemed terrified of me. I can't say I blame him, as I am a bit intimidating in all my gear (See Moto-Stealth pts. 2 and 4). Wish he'd had some tape though...
I went inside and asked one of the dummies behind the counter if they had any tape-like materials. Apparently the dummy had never heard of tape, or motorcycles. Dummy asked if I wanted a bag to put my bag of chips in.
It took all I had not to say "No, as my problem is that I already HAVE one bag too many."
Luckily, that's when the first guy I talked to came back into the store and said "hey, will this help?"
My man had that prince of binding equipment: the bungee cord. I wanted to hug him.
Instead, I said "Yeah, that'll be great! Thanks!"
The chips made it home ok, with only a little breakage (most of that was probably from me kicking them every time I got on and off the bike).
Anyway, every now and then someone does something so awesome for me that it really shakes my whole "people suck" philosophy up. Thanks for saving the day, bungee-having-dude.
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Official Pizza Review - Pizzeria Bianco
You know, except for the "no money, havin' to do housework" part, not having a job rocks.
Anyway, 'Slice of Heaven', a pizza tour/review book by noted non-motorcyclist Ed Levine rated Pizzeria Bianco the best pizza place in America. Naturally, when a place is declared the best in America, and it's less than 30 minutes from my house, I gotta go check it out.
The Place: Pizzeria Bianco
623 E Adams St.
Phoenix, AZ 85004
602-258-8300
The Pie: The Sonny Boy - Salami and kalamata olives
The Posse: The usual band of misfits - Me, Lady Luck, Baldy-Beard, Bo and Baby-Bo
The Crust: The crust was the single best part of the entire experience. I hate to describe it as such, but it was crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside. I think I could have easily eaten just the crust with a little butter and garlic. 5 Crying Luckies
The Sauce: The sauce was, shall we say, discrete. It tasted like tomatoes, and that was about it. By now, you all know that I think the sauce should have a prominent role in any pizza, so I was a little disappointed. It didn't suck though. 3 Crying Luckies
The Toppings: For one thing, I discovered that I don't like kalamata olives. That's not the restaurant's fault, and I just picked them off. After that, it was pretty fine. I learned that they make their own mozzarella, which gives them mad DIY points. The olives and salami combined to make for an intensely salty pizza. Personally, I'd hold one or the other (but I don't like the olives, don't forget). 4 Crying Luckies
The Ambiance: They're in a groovy old building that used to be a blacksmith's shop. Since it used to be a forge, I had to love it. It's a tiny, tiny place, which presents a problem - a two freakin' hour wait, even though we showed up before they opened. The staff were wonderful, and this would certainly be a good place to bring a date. Provided you and your date are comfortable hanging out outside for TWO FREAKIN' HOURS. They don't take reservations unless there are 6 or more in your party, so you can see the problem for the romantic pizza-fiend. 3 Crying Luckies
The Ride: Downtown Phoenix in rush hour. Roadwork. Confusing one ways, and asshats everywhere. 1 Crying Lucky
Overall: Originally when I started "The Great Motorcycle Pizza Tour," I thought I'd tour the country looking to find the BEST pizza in the U.S. While I'm sure I'll eventually find "the best," I doubt I'll give it a grand title like "The Best Pizza In the U.S." I'll probably call it "My Favorite" or, "The Pie You MUST Try Before You Die" but not the "Best."
Why not? Because having had the "Best" pizza in the country last night, I can honestly say I've had better (that's for another review...). That's not to say that Pizzeria Bianco wasn't good. It was really good. The wait sure sucked though, and there are other pizzas I've liked more.
4.5 Crying Luckies
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Scruples, Skittles and Shizzle
Anyway, today my server neglected to charge me for my meal. Being an honest guy, my first thought wasn't "woohoo, free lunch!" but instead "where the hell is she going?"
I hung around for a minute or two, and I have to admit I was tempted to leave without paying.
Instead, I went up to the burger-building and grabbed one of the employees and let him know I still needed to pay. He said, to quote, "oh, wow, thanks for your honesty."
Without getting all preachy, what the hell is wrong with the world that some kid at a fast food joint is amazed by honesty? I was just doing the right thing.
To end this not-preachy-at-all rant on a related but different topic, I strongly recommend Sonic's cherry limeades. They're just good.
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Official Pizza Review - Sauce
We tried a place called "Sauce" that Bo had heard about. I can't find anything about them on the web, so for the time being I'm going to assume they're non-corporate (surprising, because they had a very polished and target-marketed vibe).
Anyway, on to the review!
The Place: Sauce
Off of Baseline and Val Vista in Mesa, AZ. Sorry folks, I can't find a listing for them ANYWHERE. When I finally see one I'll update this.
The Posse: Lady Luck, Baldy-Beard, Bo, Baby-Bo and your charming host.
The Pie: Pepperoni and Crimini Mushrooms.

The Crust: It was sort of a flatbread kinda thing. I dunno. It didn't take away from the pizza, and the crispy edges were a delight. 3 Crying Luckies
The Toppings: Hot damn! The cheese was freaking great, the pepperoni was thoroughly acceptable, and the crimini mushrooms were meaty and flavorful. 4 Crying Luckies
The Sauce: There was actually enough sauce on this pizza to notice it! That's one small step for mankind, but one giant leap for pizzerias in Arizona. Alas, the sauce was only adequate. Although noticeable, it didn't distinctly add or detract from the pizza. 3 Crying Luckies
The Ambiance: Ever been to Pei Wei? Like that, only with pizza and less oriental decorations. There were fake brick walls, and cruddy "hip" furniture. That said, the soda fountain was delightful. It made a great sound as the soda was being dispensed. The perfect ssshhhhhhht noise. It was like my own white noise sugar water machine. 1 Crying Lucky
The ride: Better than being in a car at least. We had a great time trying to find the place, as it was in a fancy strip mall. I think we rode past it 4 times, all told. 1 Crying Lucky
Overall: I would go back. The pizza was mighty fine, and nothing about the place screamed "STAY AWAY." 3.5 Crying Luckies overall
Monday, April 03, 2006
And then after I stared at the wall for a while...

In addition to job hunting, I met Lady Luck for lunch (which means an hour of riding, as well as good company), and I have to mail off the taxes and go to the library.
Speaking of taxes and library, I gotta go.
We hit a pizza place this weekend. Expect a review tomorrow!
Thanks for all the support, too. With any luck, this will be the best period of unemployment EVER!




